A big decision

Blacks and I have been house hunting for a few months now and think we have seen at least 30 places. This experience has tested our relationship but have also made up find out more about ourselves too.

So where are we now?

2 places; an apartment and a terrace. A big decision.

Thats all I am willing to divulge but I hope the next time I blog, I would at least be able to update on our decision. Or even better, in our new home.

Now, let's sleep on this.

on the second last day of 2015

For some reason, I clicked on my blog link on my favourite tab tonight and started reading. My last entry was when Adam turned 2. 2 weeks old. It has been about 3 years since my last entry. Going through about 4 posts, I think my writing was pretty good during those days when I was blogging regularly. These days, I am good at writing only emails. Business emails nonetheless. Where did my love for journaling gone to?

Not to kid myself, I don't think my passion has returned and I may, first, not even finish this entry and second, even if I do, not journal again for another 3 years. But what the hell. Since I am "feeling it" tonight and I am done with my chores, the kids are all asleep. Why not.

Just to fill in the gap as to what has happened in the last 3 years. Adam turned 3 (obviously) and Blaecks added one new member to our family. Austin Tay Jun Zhi. Born 13 February 2015 at Mount Elizabeth Hospital. Weighed 3.19kg at birth. Currently 10 months and 17 days and weighing at approx 10.5kg. He's the reason why I breathe and live. Well, the second reason why I breathe and live.

Adam continues to amaze and make me laugh everyday. Sure, he makes me yell at him, get angry with him and scold him. But like all my previous post, there are good days and there are bad days and I sure have more good than bad.

A sudden thought. In 15 mins time, the Blaecks are celebrating our 9th year wedding anniversary. We did a staycation yesterday at Pan Pacific Hotel yesterday as a mark of celebration but we were both so tired and just happy to not have to wake up in the middle of the night for a feed and not have Adam burst through our bedroom door at 6.45am.

Oh, I should update the blog name. It says Ramblings from the heartlands of Punggol. Technically, thats not so accurate anymore cos I am blogging from the Mountbatten and its more city fringe than heartland. Yes, you guessed it. Another update....Blaecks have sold our loveshack642 at Punggol Drive. On the official papers, 29th December is the handover date. We gave in the keys a week earlier. I hope the new couple (Ronny and wife) and their 2 daughters will continue to create great memories in loveshack642 like the Blaecks did.

Wow. Impressed I have typed so much so far without multitasking.

What else.

Oh, and I have moved companies since the last entry. I would have been Marketing Manager, Asia in 2012 at OpenText Corporation. I am now Head of Marketing, Asia, Middle East and Africa of Check Point Software Technologies. Feel blessed to be in this position even though the organisation is really extremely peculiar. I've left OpenText for a little over a year and while i enjoyed myself there, the singapore office headed by a gentleman (no. scratch that....). headed by an imbecile is a working environment where if you are not sales, you are worse than scum. He doesn't create an environment of mutual respect and displays a leadership of no backbone. i was glad to be rid of him.

so that kinda sums up the last 3 years.

will i blog again? Im not sure but i highly doubt it. but ill certainly be back to read again.

Hey Mr Cranky

The terrible twos...meet the terrible two-week-old! Adam Tay aka Mr Cranky went with Blaecks to Dr Kek for a postpartum review last Friday. As usual, Mount E parking was horrible and we were already running late. So I got down first with Mr Cranky (who was a sleeping angel the entire car ride). As a new parent, I had forgotten the golden rule - NEVER SEPARATE BABY FROM BABY BAG.

Sure enough, ten mins after arriving at the clinic, Mr Cranky decided he was hungry. Everything that was needed, including the trusty dummy was in the baby bag which was in the car and Black was still severely stuck in the wait for a parking lot. The decibel of Mr Cranky's cries were so loud I politely exited from the clinic....kind clinic nurse came to me and offered me a private room to breastfeed.

Geez...I dont do breastfeeding! I express! I so see the benefits of being able to simply shove your boob into your infant's mouth....damnit.

I tried anyway but Mr Cranky was too agitated to feed painlessly....luckily Blacks came shortly after to save the day......relive.

Saturday went by fairly eventless-ly. The Blaecks had lunch with ChiChi, Grandma Lily and Wong Wong. HAPPY BIRTHDAY CHICHI!

Oh. Its the 4th of November. Happy Wedding Anniversary to Grandpa Elvis and Grandma Lily! 

Blaecks + 1 : Parenthood Week 1

We past the first week of parenthood! *clap clap*

I want so much to say this next "In the past week, we laughed, we cried, we had ups and we had downs" but in all honesty, it has been mostly ups, mostly laughs and all too surreal still. Well at least for me.

Blacks says he wonders what goes through the grandparent's mind when they stare at Baby Boy and smile. I said Im not sure, but I'm at the point when I look at Baby Boy, I still find it all to surreal. I can't believe that we made him, I carried him for 9 months, I was in labour for 12 hours and we have had him in our lives, almost not being able to remember what was it like before he came. On a Sunday afternoon, what would the Blaecks be doing without Baby Boy? Seems as though someone turned the program button in us overnight such that our schedule automatically wrapped itself around the feeding schedule of Baby Boy. Oh yeah, not forgetting the "pumping" schedule of Mummy Eck.

This week, 2 long time family friends came to visit and Ang Moh said to me "I can't believe the little shit is a mum." Ditto to that. I can't believe it myself. I think many people can't believe it either....

Well, a week down and a lifetime more to come. But kudos to the Blaecks for surviving the first week...!

Blaeck + 1 = Parenthood Day 4

Like all parents say "sleeping babies are like angels, awake babies are like lucifer", Adam is no different. In his 4 day on this planet, he has made up his mind on crying for no rhyme or reason. 1 hour of crying fit this morning sent the Blaecks into total confusion. What is it that you want?!

Then again, what can we complain about? This little man slept soundly from 11.30pm to 4.45am, giving us a good enough rest as well. So I suppose its a thank you?

On the breast front, I made a little progress. Though my boobs are sore and cracked, I expressed A LOT more milk today. Still supplementing with formula and no shame there, I rather be a happy mummy than a stressed out one. But one step forward and two steps back, engorgement has started and though I though I found myself to be so happy being able to lie on my stomach again today, MY BOOBS HURT!!!!

Blacks continue to amaze me with his paternal instincts. He's such a good husband and a awesome awesome dad.

Blaecks + 1 : Parenthood Day 3

9 months of gestation complete with the weight gain, morning sickness, backache and swollen feet, a 3.26kg baby boy came out of me on 19 October 2012 at 8.19pm after 8.5hrs of labour (complete with 10 fingers, 10 toes, 2 eyes, 1 nose, 2 ears and 1 mouth - as counted by the nurse).

Its day 3 of parenthood for the Blaecks and we have completely no idea what to do nor what to expect. One Army Major and One Marketing Manager surrender to this not yet educated, unable to speak nor fend for himself little Baby Adam. We wonder what every little whimper is about, what is going through his mind what most importantly, what's coming up next.

Regrettably, I haven't had that magical moment where I look at Adam and the maternal instinct in my switches on. Of course that isn't to say I don't love my son. I do...a lot and I am amazed that he is a product of the love the Blaecks share. But maybe the pragmatic side of me wonders really, what's gonna happen now?

Through the whole 3 days experience, I am however, extremely amazed by Blacks. I think his paternal instincts switched on the moment Adam came out. He's so gentle, so patient and you can tell he will literally shield his son from the perils of the world. (He even laughed as he got the peed-on initiation this evening!). If anything at all, the last 3 days has solidified by love for my husband and "renewed" our wedding vows.

Questioning the intentions of one Tan

The Presidential Election is round the corner. 2011 has been quite a year, starting with the General Elections where history was made when An opposition party won a GRC.

4 Tans are up for the top job in this election one of which belonged to an opposition party who also ran for the General Elections in May. I am a little perturbed by this and wonders what is his true intentions for wanting to be the President. In May, the candidate was at the receiving end of some flak from the ruling party on his role with the government when he worked for then PM which may or may not have caused him to lose. But this time, he seemed like he is back with vengeance, receiving the Certificate of Eligibility, he has now officially embark onto the route to hopefully, become the next President of Singapore.

So why am I perturbed by this?

Firstly, this candidate has been talking about the current government policies and how it should be changed. He talked about how he is not in favor of the casino, how Singapore should move away from manufacturing and that Singaporean men enter the workforce 2 years later than men overseas because of NS. The role of the President of Singapore is a custodian one. And as stated clearly from the Law Minister, the President is not to openly disagree with the government. All policies are still governed by the government afterall. So while as a citizen, I want a People's President, I don't want one who will cause more conflict in the government by constantly disagreeing. Is the candidate still reeling from the adrenaline from the General Elections or simply want to be in politics so much that he will take any role?

Secondly, comes the argument on the President's salary. Yes, we all agree that 4.3million annual salary is a huge sum. The question on whether justifiable really is quite subjective. This candidate has indicated that he will only ask for 500k annual salary. Now I ask, how is the figure arrived? $500,000 equates to about $40,000ish a month. Its my assumption that when one becomes a President, there would be medical benefits which extends to the family. Accommodation and transport is provided for and education for children should also be covered. With everything covered by the country, what would a person do with 40k a month? I'm sure there are families who earn much much less and still managed to put 4 children through University.

With this 2 reasons, I really cannot help but also then question what is the intentions of this candidate. And perhaps, he should also himself, take a step back and reflect what is his political objective. I strongly believe if a politician wants to make a difference to the country and have a direct hand in policy making, he/she will not want to "rule" the country as a custodian President. He/She will continue their role in grassroots, continue working the ground, understanding the people and formulate a stronger plan to better the country in the next General Elections.

I truly hope this candidate does not win. In this global world of turmoil, we don't need more conflict.

Let me start by proclaiming that I am a patriot. I am born and bred Singaporean and I love this country. Singapore has given me a world class standard education, a convenient transportation system and a safe environment where I can walk alone at night and not worry too much about crimes.

I also preach often to my disgruntled friends that we need to be grateful. Grateful for the government for our economy, our high standard of living and our safe country. Our founding father, MM Lee, was a visionary, a gutsy risk taker and an very wise men. Not discounting of course, the equally as intelligent people who helped him in building this country.

Sad to say, I am also slightly apathetic towards politics. The every day hustle and bustle of life tires me enough to not want to "burden" myself with the woes of the nation. I have the same struggles as all normal middle class families. My father was a business owner who enjoyed brisk business in the good times but saw his livelihood close in the financial crisis. My mother, his life and business partner, stuck through thick and thin with him, was also forced into retirement at an early age. Lucky for my parent, the money they saved and the investments they owned, allowed them to retire and work only on a leisurely basis. My parents put 3 daughters through overseas education and we never needed to worry about the food on the table and money in our pockets.

In 2006, I married a wonderful man of my dreams. (well technically, false because Brad Pitt was the man of my dreams, but realistically speaking). He is a civil servant and in 2008, we moved into our HDB and led our middle class married lives.

Despite being a patriot and carefree individual, I watch the GE unfold in front of my eyes and I start to ponder. Why are the opposition so strong this time? Aren't we all happy middle class citizens?

I read both the PAP's and Workers Party manifesto and reflected on my own life.

Improvements can be made. And should be made.

I'm am not talking about overthrowing the regime. We have not been suppressed for a decade under an authoritarian rule or suffered under the hands of a corrupt government. But merely an alternative voice, a different perspective, an alternate view. 

Housing

An issue close to heart, my husband and I have applied unsuccessfully, 6 times for a flat. Out of which, I have only given a "Q" number once. And that ONE time, I had a number of 2xxx for about 1xx flats. And when I called into HDB to enquire about the estimate date of selection, I was told by the HDB representative that "Its a number that have zero chance of selecting. Its actually a number to tell you, you wont have a chance." My husband serves his country. He is hardworking and he has the passion, yet his country doesn't want to give him a roof over our heads. 


My biggest thought on housing is that policies should not be made in silo. While one ministry encourage living young couples to live near their parents, another should not make it difficult to. 


Housing remains one of, if not the biggest ticket item purchase. And as wages increase with economy, the government needs to shift income ceiling for HDB upwards as well, especially with the couples marrying late. Because you end up with the dilemma, "Do you wish for lower salary so that your combine income allows you to buy a HDB or enjoy the luxury of a private condominium but struggle with your monthly mortgage?" 

My friends in Hougang GRC who have been unhappy with Worker's Party, stop and think about this. Why til today, is upgrading of Potong Pasir and Hougang, the "carrot" that PAP dangles to secure more votes? Just because residents there want to have that a different perspective in the government, someone to help play devils advocate, that they don't deserve a conducive living environment? While you are quick to judge WP for not "taking care" of Hougang, do you also then think whether they had a chance to? 


HDB flats are government housing meant for all citizens of Singapore. When Singaporeans pledge, we use words like "equality" and phrases like "regardless of race, language or religion". Do we now need to also add "regardless of political belief"? Should basic infrastructure like government housing and transportation discriminate citizens who wish for a alternative perspective in government?


I am still at odds of who to vote for. A tried and tested PAP who has, afterall, brought Singapore tremendous success in last 40 years or an alternative voice, that also seem rather credible, if given an opportunity, to continue our success as a nation. But I refuse to vote solely for the "brandname" - as suggested by Mr Chin Harn Tong at yesterday's Aljunied GRC PAP rally.


7 May. Polling Day. We shall see.