So Un-becoming of me

I am for once gonna share something with people who read this blog that I feel displays my vunerability and is so un-becoming of me. God knows who reads this rubbish blog except my rubbish sisters and close friends hahaha.

Recently (well more like last Saturday), I went for an interview for Emirates to be a Cabin Crew. I had gone into their website and found out that they were holding a global assessment for Cabin Crew and I thought that I would like to try. Though as silly as it may seem, I didn't wanna try because 'its has been my childhood dream to be a Air Stewardess' (as many might say). I tried because of 2 main reasons; (1) I wanted to feel beautiful. (2) I wanted to match the rest of Black's friend's girlfriend who were flight attendents. I guess when you're an ugly duckling for so long, you'll do anything and everything to feel beautiful.

And so I did, to my suprise, I got through to the 2nd round of Interview and on Sunday, I went for a briefing session about the Second interview. 10am it started and 40 mins into the brief, I remembered thinking to myself 'what am I doing here? Look at the girls around you, where do you fit in?' I started to hyperventilate a bit and really think about the whole thing and whether I am ready to leave Singapore again and live in a foreign place. AGAIN.

Besides when I first have the thought of being an air stewardess, I wanted to be nothing else except a dignified Singapore Girl. Sure, everyone diss them nowadays. Everyone thinks the calibre has gone down the drain. But at the very least, its still SINGAPORE GIRL. Portrayed as Dignified. Poised. Beautiful. I wanna be that.

I will continue through Emirates interview. If I get it, I think I will regretfully decline but if I don't I won't think too much about it.

I have the most important job in the world now. I am Xiaohei's girlfriend. I am his pillar of support and the woman behind this successful man.

For people who know me before Xiaohei, this is why I say its so un-becoming of me.